Today, I woke up after working a long night. In fact, Kimi and I had to work on our 13th Anniversary, how romantic of me. (Sorry Kimi)
I got out of bed slowly at about 2pm, my whole body hurts. I sit down to some coffee, and begin to write things that I had been thinking about. Things that hurt, and that have left a scar.
So I sit and start to type another round of nastiness (its been sort of frequent lately). I post it. Then, I think about it. And I unpost it within about 5 minutes.
Instead, I wrote about Bowe Bergdahl, and I posted it on Clovis Star. It made me think twice about posting here something nasty on BZC.
My article about Bowe Bergdahl is something I think about, not always in regards to him, but the PTSD thing in general.
Ive wrote about this a few times on xCannabis.com; http://xcannabis.com/?s=tough+mudder
I have a neighbor who has saw a lot of combat, and he went through hell. I had a little left over PTSD from my accident, which is fading.
Kimi says that I deal with stress differently now, after the accident. Im a little more edgy. But overall the symptoms have faded.
I’ve had a few serious emotional breakdowns. But the frequency is much less, and I am getting back on my feet.
But I think if I were in my neighbors shoes, I wouldn’t be as recovered as I am right now. His level of terrible shit was way completely hard core compared to my little car accident.
But my heart bleeds for him (Bowe) and his family, There are a lot of un-answered questions that I would still like answers to. But I hope they find peace some how.
War is some terrible shit. Thinking about very horrible shit that happens in my life, and then seeing stuff like this which is so very heart-aching. It makes my problems look small.
Some times being humbled by others is in itself a blessing.